My (Mostly) Caffeinated Thoughts

[This is the prologue to my first Star Wars novel] A ship. Because it always starts with a ship. It entered the atmosphere leisurely, as if flown by one whose time is always his own. Descending, unheeded, toward the remote plains outside the city, it landed quietly, and from it emerged a man. He was tall, hooded, and powerful, and he strolled purposefully toward the city. He had no map or device by which to orient himself, yet he knew exactly where he was going. And so he traversed the miles from his ship to his destination silently and without incident. His destination was a small home near the outskirts of the city. Within, a young boy of seven years was sitting down to supper with his father. The mother of the boy and wife of the father had been dead for some time, and all that each had now was the other. The father smiled fondly at his son as he prepared their supper, tired though he was from the day ’ s work. As he finished preparations and set the food on the table, a sh

The sunlight filters through the canopy and slices its way between the branches, making the leaves seem fragile and translucent as it exposes their veins. From certain angles, the beams of light look like you could reach out and grab them with your hands. The dust particles rise and fall slowly, floating in a vacuum unaffected by gravity. I see none of this as I sit in the solemn silence of the forest, for my eyes are closed, and my thoughts are elsewhere. Nothing moves around me except the dust and the occasional soft breeze in the trees above. My mind ranges far over the mountains in search of inspiration and peace. In the stillness, I feel my normally anxious heart subside and beat slowly, until I can hear nothing but the sound of it palpitating within me. Out here, the small issues of the village seem petty. Temporary. Illusive. In the depth of the forest, the pain and the injustice of it all are distant and remote, like the happenings of another life in another part of another

Don’t love unless you’re ready to have your heart broken That’s what they tell you Mostly they’re referring to romantic love when they say that, I think Relationship Love A connection between two people, each desiring the full affection and acceptance and adoration of the other in a mutually exclusive and forever bond but both equally scared that perhaps the other is not all-in and unsure if they themselves are all-in Those can be messy And painful When the other person decides he or she is no longer all-in And removes himself or herself from your life (in that capacity) And all that you hoped for and dreamed about is stripped away from you in an instant And you are left with a hole inside of you And you wonder if your heart will ever be the same again That sucks But it’s not just true in relationships It is also the case in art Don’t love something unless you’re willing to have your heart broken Art is a funny thing It makes deep connection p

Having dreams can be a lot like pregnancy. You’re going through your life, and suddenly you realize that something is growing inside of you. Sometimes you remember the exact moment when it was given life; sometimes you can’t and it feels more like an accident But once it starts growing, it won’t stop. You can push it to the back of your mind or try to ignore it or drown it out with hard work and reality, but the dream grows and grows within you until you have no choice but to nurture it and bring it to fruition And then, at some point, the dream is birthed and it grows outside of you and other people nurture it, too, and you reach a point where the small seed inside of you is now something so much bigger than you And impacting people you’ve never met And has surpassed even the dream that you had for your dream And you’re grateful that the dream wouldn’t leave you alone now Because the pain of the pregnancy and the delivery pales in comparison with the fulfillment of